“¡¿Que hay todavía?!” a voice shouts from the ghoulish black van rolling down the street beside us. The man at the grill behind the taco stall—his greasy apron glaring white under the cooking lights—calls back, hands waving in emphasis, and—
¡Vaya! — EEERRREEEEEEE!!!!!
The vehicle abruptly skirts to the curb, parking at the corner of the narrow street. Two stout Mexicans with round bellies hurry out of the car and hustle over to join the crowd of middle-aged locals huddled around the grill. The magic brewing at the griddle has drawn an evening crowd, and we’re all salivating.
They’re not sold out yet!
“¡Dos de labio!” the grill master shouts, like a trumpet blast, cutting through the warm air as he holds his product and looks about. Hands shoot from the crowd, snatching the white paper plate already wilting under the weight of two cow cheek tacos, their juices seeping into the thin barrier. The plate bobs toward the salsa bar, guided by its beholder’s hungry grip. Creamy green and red salsas splash the meat, followed by a scattering of freshly minced tomatoes and onions. Holy &$!#. That looks good.
“¡Tres de cabeza!” More hands draw taco-laden saucers away from the grill, then float eagerly to the salsa bar. I watch as fresh tomato and onion are thickly coated with red chile salsa, drenching the meat and tortilla. Another moment, a splash of orange salsa, and translucent reddish—
“¡Ocho de labio!”
Holy &$#. One of those is mine! I grab the plate with both hands, careful not to let the flimsy paper turn this story into a tragedy. The tortilla is small—maybe four inches wide—but oh! so fresh! Lightly scorched, glistening with savory orange juices from the tender meat piled at its center. Finely minced, the beef forms a small ridge along the middle. Just meat. Simple and scrumptious.
I can see the intermix of muscle and fatty tissue—it’s clearly well-marbled. Cow cheeks aren’t very muscular, so that makes sense. My heart pumps, my stomach is tectonically active, and I’m grinning as I step up to the salsa bar.
Oh! The dilemma!
Unlike taco shops in the U.S., each stall here makes its salsa fresh, and each one is unique. Fortunately, they tend to be variations of the same recipes so I quickly recognized my options.
There’s always an orange, fiery one—that’s habanero salsa. Hot AF. The creamy green one next to it—that’s avocado, cream, cilantro, and lime. It’s cool, smooth, and soothing. Next to that, a standard red chile salsa with pepper flakes—hot, but not insane. Good balance of heat and flavor. Beside it, the translucent red chili oil—It’ll bite your tongue and make you sweat. And finally, the mildest of the bunch, pico de gallo—an honest blend of minced tomato, onion, and cilantro. The radishes and pickled carrots nearby soothe your mouth, antidotes to the burn of the chilis—“¡Dos mas de Labios!”
Moments! Only moments! I have only moments before I’ll be ushered along by the next salivating taco-bearer.
Ah, yes! Our taco tour guide, Manu, explained earlier which salsas pair with each taco. The crispy, cheesy crunch of the volcán taco we savoured earlier—with its lean carne asada—shined with a splash of chile oil and creamy avocado. The same combo, spicy and creamy like a one-two flavor punch to the tongue, worked wonders for the savory marlin taco. The fried ahi-ahi? Oh! So perfect with the spicy tartar sauce.
But for the masterpiece before me, the taco de labio—sourced from the cow’s cheek with meat so tender and fatty that it melts on your lips before your mouth even has a chance—simplicity wins the day. A splash of avocado salsa and a dash of fresh pico de gallo.
The first bite—Oh. Ohhh. The meat collapses on my tongue, buttery and rich, juices slipping past my lips. The tortilla holds strong, cradling the perfect balance of creamy avocado, acidity, and fat. For a moment, everything else fades—the sounds, the crowd, the sizzling grill. Just this. Just now.
Ok, I am getting hungry and need to stop. But, I sense you get the point. Tacos and Mexico are wedded forever, and I didn’t even introduce the Al Pastor tacos, which came much later in the evening. GOOD LORD! I returned for them each night after, and they made up a lion’s share of the 25 tacos I devoured during my short four day visit to Puerto Vallarta.
Over the following three days, I found beef tongue and beef head tacos at a stall near the riverwalk, on the hot side of town. The cow face and cow eye tacos were served a few miles north, just south of the community park. Don’t worry, it wasn’t the actual eyeball, but rather the cooked tendony meat of the eye socket. The cow face tacos, well, I’m not sure where on the face those came from exactly. I’ll admit, both required additional salsa to mask the peculiar textures. However, I cant help but respect that every part of the cow is utilized, even if some yield subpar tacos.
Recommendations
Vallarta Food Tours – A great food tour. Highly recommend.
El Carboncito – Al Pastor Tacos! It’s in the 5th of December neighbor, a hotbed for expats, so its also a great place to find some English speaking friends. Each Taco, 25 MXN.
Tacos La Bombita – Small food cart on the east side of the Zona Romatica. It’s a great place to walk to along the river. The Tacos de Lengua, and Tacos de Cabeza are supreme. This was a recommendation from our tour guide. Each Taco, 25 MXN.
Maricsos El Guero – The fried ahi-ahi taco… mmmm… delicious. Our tour guide also recommended some sort of baked Pineapple dish? I never was able to try it, but apparently everything on the menu is fantastic.
Cheers, friends! Thanks for reading and happy adventuring!
OOLIN